Daily Google horoscope

Rick Levine, the author of the daily Google horoscopes, wisely advises:

Your friends are not the greatest positive influence on your life now, because they may encourage you to expand your horizons and open your heart to deep mystical truths. This would be a great idea, except you have very basic responsibilities that you must handle today. Don't let anyone pull you off course; just keep returning to the obligations that are right there on your plate.

The fortune that S received in her fortune cookie earlier this week said: "You have the ability to sense and know higher truth."

Rick Levine is right (obviously--he's psychic): S is kind of a bad influence. She's constantly bothering me about expanding my horizons and opening my heart to deep mystical truths. I've always felt bad saying, "I can't right now--I have to paint my nails / buy clothes off eBay / study my reflection in the mirror," but now, thanks to Rick, I can just cleverly say, "Sorry, I can't--I have obligations."